(blog post written for Jewlicious.com).

He’s not quite Kim Kardashian, her sister Khloe, or even John Edwards – but he’s pretty damn sexy.

You know, those sagging man-boobs, that voluptuous beer gut (wait, Muslims can’t drink?) and that carpet of thickly matted chest hair – what more could a secretary desire on her first day of work?

“Do I turn off the light or do you?” the man says in a video, aired on Israeli television earlier this week. ”What is the procedure?”

Rafiq Husseini, a now former top aide to Palestinian Authority President Mahmoud Abbas slides completely naked slide into bed, calling an unseen woman to join him, in what was allegedly an effort to trade his political influence for sex  This morning, however, Abbas dismissed Husseini from office and has formed a special committee to investigate allegations of corruption in his administration, West Bank-based Ma’an News Agency reported earlier today.

Along with a full-fledged video crew, former Palestinian intelligence official Fahmi Shabaneh had planted hidden cameras in the apartment, after being tipped off by the woman in question. Through a stream of text messages and meetings, Husseini had allegedly informed the potential secretary that if she wanted to be hired, “she needed to meet him in the bedroom for a little manual labor first,” according to FOX News. Shouldn’t politicians be smart enough by now to understand that if they are stupid (and/or horny) enough to engage in a sex scandal, there’s always bound to be irrevocable evidence?

After the news became public in Israel  through reports by The Jerusalem Post and Channel 10’s Tzvi Yehezkeli, even the editor-in-chief of Ma’an News Agency, Nasser Laham, wrote an editorial urging Husseini to step down, calling Husseini’s indecency an “embarrassment” to the Palestinian people – though, Laham does go on to call for Shabaneh’s arrest and makes sure to highlight all of Israel’s own financial and sexual scandals. In fact, the Palestinian Authority actually has a warrant out for Shabaneh’s arrest for his so-called “collaboration with Israel,” The Jerusalem Post reported.

And just when we thought Israel might be in the clear for once, relatives of Husseini and top aides to Abbas are naturally calling the tapes an “Israeli conspiracy”  blaming the Israeli government, Mossad and Shin Bet for the incident.

I’m sorry, but if a Palestinian politician can’t keep his pants on, it’s absolutely absurd to blame the Israeli government. Did Israel instruct this man to peel off his clothes, slide sexily under the covers and beckon an innocent woman to his bedside? I don’t think so. Likewise, did a team of Republicans conspire to film John Edwards’ extramarital tryst? I don’t think so.

I hope that for once, the media will give Israel a break and not assign blame where blame is so obviously not due. Blame belongs in one place in this scenario, and that place is below Husseini’s forestial belt-line.

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Warning, the video below is quite explicit and disturbing to the eyes, in more ways than one.

Sharon Udasin is a staff writer at The Jewish Week. Follow her on Twitter or e-mail her at sharon@sharonudasin.com.

Hurling Curses Amid The Whitefish

A tense meeting Sunday at the Sixth Street Community Synagogue revealed sharp divisions at the shul.

by Sharon Udasin
Staff Writer

There is nothing remotely community minded about the war that is gripping the Sixth Street Community Synagogue.

Tensions at the East Village Orthodox shul, which have been building between old-timers and newly recruited younger members for six months, erupted last Sunday morning at a meeting to elect new board members

The two sides hurled curses at one another in the shul basement, where a spread of whitefish salad and bagels had been laid out. At one point, someone suggested that the police be called in to restore calm. And when new member Spencer Schneider rushed into the hall urging members to vote on his yellow ballots, which touted a slate of new board members rather than the white ballots made up of more longstanding board members, he got an education in shul politics, East Village style.

“Who are you?” Schneider said when approached by a longtime member of the shul. The man replied, “I didn’t see you in shul yesterday.”

The battle for the soul of the 70-year-old Sixth Street Community illustrates just how dicey it can be to try to revitalize flagging synagogues. Longtime members feel the shul — which has seen its membership double since last spring — is being stolen out from under them by carpetbaggers, new members who don’t even live in the neighborhood and who rarely attend services. The new members say they have revived a shul that was on its last legs, and that the old-timers want to strip them of their voting rights.
“We hoped that maybe someone who lived in the community would join,” Schoenfeld said. “I’d take a lie detector test — there’s not one new member that has been here on Friday night or Saturday. Not even their leaders.”

At the center of the struggle stands Rabbi Simon Jacobson and his Meaningful Life Center. A popular and charismatic Lubavitch-born rabbi and author, Rabbi Jacobson moved the center’s headquarters to the Sixth Street Synagogue two years ago. In lieu of paying rent to the shul, he agreed to renovate the entire basement floor and pay the synagogue 30 percent of the proceeds from his programs.

Rabbi Jacobson told The Jewish Week that last spring he was approached by then-Board Chairman Matthew Pace, asking if he would encourage some of his participants to become shul members. The rest of the board was aware and in favor of a membership drive, part of which would solicit Rabbi Jacobson’s crowd as new members, according to board meeting minutes obtained by The Jewish Week.

“I said to them, ‘Are you sure that’s what you want? Because if people start becoming members, members are shareholders,’ ” Rabbi Jacobson said. “They said ‘We’re sure that’s what we want.’”

Within a few months of the initial membership drive, the synagogue population grew significantly. But for the old-timers, the effort seems to have backfired.  Continue reading…

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Lots of comments also on my article via Failed Messiah, but I have a bit of a problem with how they presented the story.

(blog post written for Jewlicious.com)

The countdown to Super Bowl XLIV (that’s 44, people) is exactly 2 days: 2 hours: 42 mins: 2 secs, but since the Giants aren’t involved, I honestly couldn’t care less. What I can’t help but wonder, however, is what Chabad is doing about the game this year.

You see, it’s been two years since Eli Manning’s “miracle drive” — the 38-yard seemingly impossible pass to David Tyree, followed by a game-winning touchdown pass to Plaxico Burress with only 39 seconds left. But that same day, some avid fans credited the Giants’ Super Bowl success to a source far mightier than Manning’s nimble arm and Tyree’s solid grasp — these fans felt that their newfound tefillin addiction had given the Giants that extra wind. After the team began that season with a lousy 0 and 2 record, lifelong fan Jay Greenfield finally caved to his Chabad rabbi and friend, Yisroel Shemtov, who had been pestering Greenfield about wearing tefillin. If the fan would strap on the prayer boxes just three times each week, Rabbi Shemtov would add the New York Giants to his prayers and ask for a little divine intervention on behalf of the beloved team.

This Sunday in sunny Miami, the New Orleans Saints face the Indianapolis Colts, led by Eli Manning’s older brother Peyton — also known to be a miracle-worker of sorts. As usual, Chabad is getting in on the action.

Rabbi Zev Katz, director of Chabad of Miami Beach (also known as “Chabad on Wheels”) has been at it all week — wrapping tefillin on visitors and locals alike who are gearing up for Sunday’s game. Throughout the week and all day today, Rabbi Katz says he’s had his mitzvah tank parked on Lincoln Road, a thoroughfare for shopping, dining and tourism in Miami Beach. And he’s had no trouble getting Jewish passers-by aboard the Chabad mobile, doing everything possible for just one more mitzvah. He even went so far as to invite anyone reading this post to attend Shabbat at his Chabad House, located on 309 23rd St.

Until then, he’ll continue to get football fans to wrap themselves with tefillin.

“We had one guy who was 13, and he wasn’t really religious at all,” Rabbi Katz said. “But he said he would do it for the Saints.”

Also in the region, Rabbi Shuey Biston (Chabad of Parkland – North Broward and South Palm Beach) is hosting a kosher Super Bowl party with over 100 guests at a community member’s home, where fans will gather first for a service, and then to watch the game.

“We always have a Super Bowl party every year,” Rabbi Biston said.

Of course, not every Saints or Colts fan will actually get to the Miami region this weekend, but Chabad in Louisiana is bringing together Jewish Saints fans for some social action. The Chabad Jewish Center of Suburban New Orleans is striking up a Super Bowl pool, where local fans have the opportunity to win up to $1,800 ($450 per quarter) just by donating $36 or $72 to the center’s educational programming.

I guess we’ll see on Sunday whether or not that 13-year-old Saints fan’s prayers were strong enough to give New Orleans’ Drew Brees the edge he needs to defeat a seemingly invincible Peyton Manning of Indianapolis.

Speaking of Mannings, let’s rewatch those final moments of Super Bowl 42, especially since the Giants were certainly not interested in offering us New Yorkers anything similar this year. And hey, maybe if a few more Giants fans (Dad?) try strapping on tefillin at their tailgating parties, next season will be a different story.

Sharon Udasin is a staff writer at The Jewish Week. Follow her on Twitter or e-mail her at sharon@sharonudasin.com.

Does anyone else remember this amazing MS-DOS game? My brother and I used to play it (sometimes with our parents) on repeat as kids. Kind of resembled the Game of Life, except that your groceries could spoil, you got loads of doctor bills and your landlord could garnish some of your wages. Not to mention Willy, who lifts your wallet, and the guy at Monolith Burgers. Anyway, my brother just discovered that some genius decided to make Jones available for free, online play without download.

Enjoy! http://home.broadpark.no/~kboye/jones/jones.html

Frozen Out Of Olympics

Last-minute Israeli ruling keeping figure skater Tamar Katz out of the Vancouver Olympics.

by Sharon Udasin

She could already see herself on the ice in Vancouver.

When New York-based, Israeli-raised ice skater Tamar Katz arrived in Israel last week for a 24-hour, whirlwind visit, Israeli Olympic Committee officials gave her the Olympic outfit and bag she would carry with her to British Columbia to represent Israel in the Winter Games.

But later that day, like a toe loop gone bad, those same officials yanked Katz’s Olympic dream away from her, ruling that she would not be going to Vancouver.

“It was the worst trip to Israel,” she told The Jewish Week Monday.

Katz, 20, who was born in Dallas and trains in upstate Monsey, moved with her family as a child to Metullah, the home of Israel’s only ice skating rink. She had qualified for the 2010 Olympics according to International Skating Union standards.

But Israeli Olympic officials required that she finish in the top 14 at the European Figure Skating Championships last month, where, weak from a virus, she placed 21st.

Katz unsuccessfully called each member individually to plead her case.
“Some of them were willing to listen to what I had to say, but the most important people I had to appeal to were not even willing to listen to anything I said. Some of them even hung up the phone on me,” Katz said.  Continue reading…

Cross-training The Body

by Sharon Udasin

For Caroline Kohles, cardiovascular fitness is a vital part of both her career and her personal life. Kohles, 48, has been the Health and Wellness fitness director at the JCC in Manhattan since it opened in 2002. Both an athlete (she has participated in triathlons) and a dancer, she is known for her combined emphasis on mind and body in every workout, a trademark that specifically comes to life in her work as a Nia martial arts trainer and black belt teacher. In April, she says, the JCC will be hosting a free multi-sport triathlon symposium.

What stands out for you when training fellow Jews at the JCC?

“Jewish people tend to want their workout to make sense – there is an intellectual component to working out. They don’t want to just do it for the sake of doing it – they want to do it because it makes sense to their livelihood and their spirit and their intellect, knowing that by taking care of their bodies they’ll be able to do other things in their life.”

Does cardiovascular training at the gym translate well to outdoor settings?

“The trick with training is what are you training for? … If it’s heart health, then you want to have a component of cardiovascular fitness. The great thing about cardiovascular fitness via triathlon training is that you cross-train the body…Triathlon training appeals to such a wide variety of body types that we find people who are all ages, shapes, sizes and genders doing triathlon training.”

How do you help JCCers to prepare for the New York City Marathon?

“For the Marathon we ran a program where we showed a film, and we had a running coach, a chiropractor that specialized in sports and running injuries, a nutritionist that specialized in running and triathlons and a massage therapist that specialized in training. … When we’re talking about heart rate and cardiovascular training specifically, there’s an opportunity for education to happen. There’s an opportunity for people to understand, ‘Wow, my heart rate is different everyday — and why wouldn’t I pay attention to that and adjust my workout accordingly?’”  Continue reading…

The Health Burden Of The Survivors

by Sharon Udasin
Staff Writer

For Jews who escaped Europe during the Holocaust and settled in Israel, the Jewish state really was a kind of Promised Land. Yet from a health perspective, the young
country couldn’t immunize them from the physical and mental burdens they carried with them.

In fact, Europeans who immigrated to Israel after the Holocaust were 2.4 times more likely to develop cancer than those who arrived before the war, according to a recent study published in Journal of the National Cancer Institute.

Researchers at the University of Haifa’s School of Public Health compiled a database of 315,544 Israeli Jews of European heritage born between 1920 and 1945. Lital Keinan-Boker, one of the authors of the study, explained that the data came from the Population Registry as well as the National Cancer Registry. Of the more than 300,000 immigrants studied, 57,496 were born in Europe and immigrated to Israel before or during World War II and did not endure the Holocaust; the remaining 258,048 moved to Israel after the war and had been caught up in the Shoah.

The scientists theorize that the biggest risk factors for these post-war immigrants were prolonged periods of both famine and severe mental stress at an early age. But funding is not yet available to test these hypotheses, wrote Keinan-Boker, who also works for the Israel Center of Disease Control.

“We cannot be sure that all of [the immigrants] were in the camps; some may have been hiding away, some in the resistance movements and some — in the USSR — running away from Poland eastwards,” she said in an e-mail interview with The Jewish Week. “The point is that our information is based on existing databases, not on individual data, and this is why we refrained from using the term ‘Holocaust survivors’; we could not be positive that all of the ‘exposed’ were indeed Holocaust survivors.”  Continue reading…

Adam Dickter interviews the Weprin brothers, Mark and David. Mark Weprin just assumed David’s old position in the City Council, while David is running for Mark’s old position in the State Assembly in a special election on Feb. 9. Produced and edited by Sharon Udasin.

Totally random, irrelevant fact for the day: There is a dinosaur named after Draco Malfoy, the junior villain of Harry Potter, called “Dracorex Hogwartsia,” according to About.com. Apparently, in 2004, some middle school kids in Indiana got the chance to name a newly discovered dinosaur.

Dracrorex Hogwartsia - Wikimedia Commons